weekly blog

Reading over my individual paper that was incorporated into the collaborative essay I found multiple corrections. I feel that although I added a lot of information, my thoughts became unclear. I feel that when revising my paper I should look for the main thought and make sure it is clearly conveyed. Then I should add detail that pertains to only that thought. Finally, I feel that I just listed off a lot of information rather connecting everything I mentioned to the main question. I have a lot of revising to do but now that I know specifically what to look for I'm on the right track.